Hey everyone I hope all is going great in you're worlds. On my end the song by emiemn, "Cleanin Out The Closet", sums up exactly what I am feeling right now. Its funny though I am not really bummed or sad or any of that when she sort of withdrew herself the first time around I reconciled with the fact that okay she really wasn't interested in me *shrugs* Not an problem I mean after all we never really met in person but we did talk all the time (that I want to make crystal clear). We talked about everything under the sun and when I offered up the question of interest...she told me yes she liked me a lot and that she was sorry she got incredibly busy.
Okay, I understand life gets hectic sometimes I more than anyone knows that especially with this calculus but there is something about saying if you like someone you show it even if its just an random text or a little phone call. But once again it became nothing but me texting her and no random phone calls or anything at all. Last night I had an grr night at work and just to really feel things out in the past she dropped things and I thought okay she is real...but she didn't she just told me okay...for that its the official understanding that things are going nowhere with her. As I mentioned above I am not really upset or anything it just is what it is and I have learned more about myself in the process and what should I believe seriously be expected in any relationship.
I am proud of myself at this rate I blocked her on facebook, blocked her on Meet Me and lastly am now as I am writing this making that phone call to call and have her number blocked. There is a song that really struck me earlier that I think propelled me further it was an song by Kenny Chesney which I believe is called: Better As A Memory, and that is probably something that really pushed me to say enough is enough. He really hit all the points on what I was feeling slash what was going through my head while I cleaned the pool. In the past I may have dwelled on this but not anymore though for that I know I have in one respect at least grown. She won't get any random phone call asking her why or an gazillion different text messages either when I say I am done I am done.
In other news, it feels good like an huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am looking forward to taking my exam on Thursday which will be the last exam I have for calculus. I know previously I asked for prayers that I do well on this and I'd really appreciate those again if you could. Overall I feel really good about this calculus and have gotten quite a bit of extra credit as well out of the class. So, I am going to bust my ass and work on this calculus and get it stuck in my brain and then I will go blow it out of the water
Mm of course there is the Boise music fest which I spoke about previously and that will be sick and a nice break from things for sure. Oh and of course there is the base ball game with some great friends on August 8th which I am most defently looking forward to. With that I am off for now back to working on calculus. Hope all is going great in you're world's. I'll catch ya on the flip side
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