That's just how it goes

Readers,

Hey everyone I hope all is going great in you're worlds. On my end the song by emiemn, "Cleanin Out The Closet", sums up exactly what I am feeling right now. Its funny though I am not really bummed or sad or any of that when she sort of withdrew herself the first time around I reconciled with the fact that okay she really wasn't interested in me *shrugs* Not an problem I mean after all we never really met in person but we did talk all the time (that I want to make crystal clear). We talked about everything under the sun and when I offered up the question of interest...she told me yes she liked me a lot and that she was sorry she got incredibly busy.

Okay, I understand life gets hectic sometimes I more than anyone knows that especially with this calculus but there is something about saying if you like someone you show it even if its just an random text or a little phone call. But once again it became nothing but me texting her and no random phone calls or anything at all. Last night I had an grr night at work and just to really feel things out in the past she dropped things and I thought okay she is real...but she didn't she just told me okay...for that its the official understanding that things are going nowhere with her. As I mentioned above I am not really upset or anything it just is what it is and I have learned more about myself in the process and what should I believe seriously be expected in any relationship.

I am proud of myself at this rate I blocked her on facebook, blocked her on Meet Me and lastly am now as I am writing this making that phone call to call and have her number blocked. There is a song that really struck me earlier that I think propelled me further it was an song by Kenny Chesney which I believe is called: Better As A Memory, and that is probably something that really pushed me to say enough is enough. He really hit all the points on what I was feeling slash what was going through my head while I cleaned the pool. In the past I may have dwelled on this but not anymore though for that I know I have in one respect at least grown. She won't get any random phone call asking her why or an gazillion different text messages either when I say I am done I am done.

In other news, it feels good like an huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am looking forward to taking my exam on Thursday which will be the last exam I have for calculus. I know previously I asked for prayers that I do well on this and I'd really appreciate those again if you could. Overall I feel really good about this calculus and have gotten quite a bit of extra credit as well out of the class. So, I am going to bust my ass and work on this calculus and get it stuck in my brain and then I will go blow it out of the water

Mm of course there is the Boise music fest which I spoke about previously and that will be sick and a nice break from things for sure. Oh and of course there is the base ball game with some great friends on August 8th which I am most defently looking forward to. With that I am off for now back to working on calculus. Hope all is going great in you're world's. I'll catch ya on the flip side

Is It True?

Readers: Hey everybody I hope all is well in your world's. I am writing a latest update of things seeing as how earlier today I asked her why she suddenly blocked me with out any word at all. Hell its funny how in the end I told myself over and over again knowing wouldn't actually help but there you have it. One thing she said has continued to stay there at the fore front of my mind when she texted me back after essentially telling me that I worried too much, that I killed things that drunken night, that I am neurotic. Probably not exactly in those different words but that was the idea though than she stopped texting me again. Later out of the blue she texted me again telling me she was sorry but that how could she expect anything else out of things after the night when I screwed up like that. Oh and of course she also threw my words in my face saying essentially that i'd never be with a woman with a kid lol The funny he he ironic fucking thing is that I made it clear w...

End To Brilliance

Readers, Hey I hope everything is going great in you're world's. On my end, I am sitting here listening to the new Miley Cyrus album, which is without an single doubt incredibly solid! Everything aside I think she is getting an extremely unfair rap. As far as I am concerned this new album shows she is incredibly musically talented and has slowly found herself. Now moving onto why this blog is sufficiently titled "End To Brilliance". I think it involves two events the first being the end of Breaking Bad this past weekend and secondly the death of Tom Clancy this morning. There are some people whom I talked to that I won't name names specifically but they said they'd have liked the show Breaking Bad to have ended differently. In my mind, after the major disappointment with how the show Dexter concluded this past weekend in my mind it was a true breathe of fresh air. No, don't worry if you're reading this I am not going to pull a bunch of spoilers out...

Wow ten years later...time for that reflection thing

Readers, Hey everyone I hope all is going great with you. On my end, I am still trying to tackle this online math class which feels like it'll never get done. I am so close but not close enough. Today is ten years since I graduated high school in 2004 and started right up at Boise State. Which of course lends itself to some reflecting on what I have accomplished, what's happened to me and just how far I have really come. I've been through what feels like a hell of a lot of bad relationships but thankfully seem to no doubt have found the one. We've now been together for four months and I have no doubt we will be together much longer! Its the school thing and not completing it that's killing me though. I look around me and am friends with a lot of people who I went to high school with and they've graduated and have great jobs. Here I am going on almost two years working in retail at Gordmans. Don't get me wrong, I like it, but I am a cashier though. Interv...

Inside The Mind Of A Writer

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