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Showing posts from May, 2011

I know i haven't written much in quite a while

I just realized how long its been since I have written a solid blog. Of course my blogs have wandered back and forth with dealing with the pain of moving on. Some days its incredibly easy and other days I am confronted with flash backs ala little snipets of memories like an out of control freight train. But in the long run though I know those flash backs serve a purpose though. They serve a purpose to remind me of what I do not want later on in my life School wise finishing up I passed two out of five classes which isn't the best thing in the world. In fact i'd go so far as to say I am not too terribly proud of that. But as I have been reminded by friends it comes with the territory. Honestly I cannot begin to thank my close friends enough Pikachu (her actual name i will keep secret for her sake) my friend John, my friend Randy and many others. They have been major life savers and of course there are many more as well. On June 8th I am going to be starting up at summer scho

Mmm its officially over over like it needs to be. But I feel dead inside

Hey guys...so its all officially over! Kind of surreal still how it all ended. Considering for those that read this how much we did an exploring of whats inside my head. How I spoke of wanting to salvage things but ultimately I realized saving things had to be a two way street. It was either we both wanted to save things or it just wasn't going to work at all. Now mind you she said last night, "Chris i was going to have Friday's off...we could spend more time together and rekindle the spark if it exists..casually date"  For me though I realized in a big way if someone cares about you alot and they know you are going through hell and back for half a month and they tell you that is not there fault....even though breaking up with you was the cause of all that...that person doesn't apologize or anything etc that is somewhat the straw that broke the camels back in a huge way. Before that it was learning the previous week that she had already hooked up with a friend

Long time but I am still here

Hey everybody I know its been a long time since i have written a blog. Overall in my world I am leaning more and more towards the reality of accepting that Trisha and I are through in a big way. Coming up on May 17th supposed to do her birthday with her ala go to the movies to see the movie Thor and second of all grab some grub. Going to do that for sure but right now avoiding talking to her like the plague because I feel so duped right now its not even funny Literally we were done for almost four months. Then I find out she has essentially already moved on and has a friend with benefits with this guy named Ben whom she has been spending an inordinate amount of time with after work playing video games, D&D etc but the fact is they have been spending alot of time together though. Which of course is fine they can spend time together but wow....only four months and she is already fucking some other guy! Truly cannot help but feel duped...like an idiot...you name the words but they a